I remember being asked by DFB readers why I always write a fiction where the guy is the victim , whereas in reality females are the real victims . In respect to that I have no comment because no one is above being hurt . Nevertheless in this article , I took myself out of my comfort zone , placed myself in a females shoes and was able to put this together .
How many hearts are yet to be broken ? Why do we love with all our hearts only to get hurt ? Parents just don’t know what being a teenager at this time and age is like . Nothing makes sense to me at all , I just spend too much time in my head having conversations with myself . My life has been a whirlwind of unfortunate events , I’ve been messed with so many times that not caring seemed to be a huge part of me , Yes its now a reflex .
My name is Elena but my friends call me Elly . I am vertically deprived and I have this thing for tall boys . I am an introvert , so when I feel down chances are I won’t actually go to anyone for help . People actually have to check on me to make sure I’m alright . I don’t think I should burden others with my problems but if anyone comes to me and proves to actually care , I might just trust them enough to let them help me . Well I found out the hard way , not everyone that you think cares really does . They’re all here for a while until they find someone better and a good excuse .
I wake up to Walter’s text this morning
‘Hey beautiful, I’ve missed you a lot, I’ve missed our awkward late night conversations . Just remember , there is a nigga out here that cares about you . Have fun today . I love you babe’
Oh those words melted my heart ! All I did for 30 minutes was smile to my phone like a retarded fool and read the text over and over again . It was the middle of summer and Walter had been away for a week on a trip with his family and was coming back today . I went to my wardrobe and picked out the gown I wore when I had first kissed him , he loved that gown and even called it ‘Walter’s miracle’ and maybe today a miracle could happen and something else would happen . It was still early in the morning and my mom was hurrying to work and my little sister was going to her best friend’s place , leaving me home alone for the day . They left and 5 minutes after I heard a knock on the door . I guess Mabel forgot her toy or something so I opened the door and Walter , who was supposed to be halfway across the world was standing right in front of me . (Now I know you expect me to scream his name and kiss him , jumping and screaming with enthusiasm but no such luck ) I slam the door in his face , I slammed it so hard that the windows rattled . Damn! My hair is horrible , I haven’t showered , I haven’t brushed . I’m running upstairs when I remember he’s still at the door , I run back down open the door and he just said , ‘hey babe, I’ve missed you so much, I just dropped my things and came right over.’ I was really conscious of my stench and my state of undress but he kissed me ,
‘I haven’t brushed or had a bath Walter’, I said to him and all he said was ‘I don’t care.’
Months passed and Walter and I were still together , yes we fought and we cursed each other but we always made up . Then suddenly after months of bliss when I had fallen in love with him even more than humanly possible , Walter began to change . He wouldn’t call , I was always the one calling . When we were together there was a lot of awkward silence I think he no longer found me interesting . But when he did call he would always end with ‘I love you’ and that moved me . Yes I was a sucker for those words .
One day, I went to Walter’s house and went upstairs to his room and saw this girl there . He introduced her as his cousin and I was fine with it . For the 1 hour I was there Walter didn’t say a single word to me , I would try to join in on his conversation with his cousin but I just wouldn’t flow . Finally , I left , feeling pissed and irritated but my ‘boo’ didn’t even chase me , he was just having too much fun with his cousin . I went home and at night I started thinking , I didn’t want to care so much but I had fallen in love with Walter and he was slowly falling out of love with me . He gradually stopped calling , stopped coming over to my place and then would treat me like crap in front of his friends . I finally went to his place to try and talk things over only to see him passionately making love to his ‘cousin’. I could see them sweating which meant they’ve been at this for 10mins maximum , I heard her call his name in pain but in that kind of pain that you love . The sad part was , I wasn’t the one calling his name in pain , I wasn’t the one in that position .
I screamed, they both sprung apart looking at me .
‘Its not what you think Elena.’
He said ,
‘Oh ? It isn’t ? So tell me you weren’t making love with your cousin ‘
I replied furiously ,’
Elena no just calm down and let’s talk about this ,’ he said ,
‘No Walter , so you can lie to me? Now I understand , all boys are just pigs!’
I said as I walked out . And that was the end of Walter and I . I’m not sure if I’m depressed , I mean I’m sad and all but its for the best yeah ? He came over to my place the other day and asked me to forgive him and have him back, I just laughed and said,
‘I’m done crying over you Walter , I’m done hoping . I’m done trying , I just realized how much I love you , how much I miss you ! The old you . Not this you that doesn’t care about me anymore , not this you that makes me sad and confused . Or maybe this was who you were all along and I never knew , I might be 50 shades of fucked up but I’m pretty sure I deserve(d) better , better than you , better than this so you know what ? Yes I have changed I am not as nice as I used to be because I don’t want to get used or walked over , I don’t trust everyone and tell them my secrets because behind every fake smile is a back stabbing bitch . I distance myself from people because in the end they’re only going to leave me. I have changed because I realized that I’m the only person I can depend on .’
He looked at me and asked , ‘So does that mean you’ll have me back ?’ I smiled and said , ‘I wish I could go back to the first day I met you and walk right past your ass , now get out ! ‘
Last Note: Don’t Get Too Comfortable , Don’t Ever Think You Can’t Get Replaced . – Alan